February 2012
62 posts
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“I had this pet dragon who was cuddled up next to me.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Peeing is like a good book in that it is very, very hard to stop once you start.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Remember that time in the minivan, twenty minutes ago, when we didn’t die?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I hated listening to everyone else stumble on their words and try to phrase...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Don’t think of it as breaking into SeaWorld. Think of it as visiting...”
– John Green Out of Context
kellelucas asked: have you thought of putting a link to the videos he says this stuff in?
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“And now I am seated in a pool of cheap champagne. What’s new?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“God will punish the wicked. And before he does, we will.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“And I wondered if hurdlers ever thought, you know, ‘This would go faster...”
– John Green Out of Context
blackdali asked: Is it bad that i know where all of these are from?
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“As long as we don’t die, this is going to be one hell of a story.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I spent more time on that final paper for that class than I did on anything else...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I mean, sex is not an inherently aerobic activity. It can be a pretty...”
– John Green Out of Context
dewdrops-on-roses asked: This is officially my new favorite blog.
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“Like meth for old people.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Let me assure you that it is no blessing to die without having had sex.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“It just seemed like the obvious place for a hot hot sex scene.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“And he does inexplicable circles around his beautiful husband and then kind of...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Can I hump the cave now?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Isaac miraculously recovered his sight and became a ballet dancer.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Where’d my baby come from?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“We were up all night in the secret lair injecting butter frosting into our...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“A person is more than a person.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“God I love rainbows”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I never thought myself to be the kind of person who pees into a mostly empty...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“A fatty trusts another fatty.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Before we can radically reshape the world, we need to shop.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“They seem like regular deer, only more dangerous.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“We got these secret fugging lairs in the center of the earth and we go down...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Well, I don’t believe in that. I believe against that.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I have this thing that makes me really uninterested in prom shoes. It’s...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“It’s not like you’re given the choice to say ‘bad bye’...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“It’s like a secret society. We got all kinds of shit you don’t know...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I believe that’s one of the bullshittiest words ever invented.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Those of us who frequent the band room have long suspected that Becca maintains...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“We fatties have a bond, dude.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“You may be smart, but I’ve been smart longer.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“How can our sentient fucking lives revolve around something slugs can do?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Not that smart. Not that hot. Not that nice. Not that funny. That’s me:...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Books are beautiful for reading, and they’re also beautiful for holding.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Whose drunken nose would you pick?!”
– John Green Out of Context
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“Just deleting vandalism on the Chuck Norris page.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“When did who you want to screw become the whole game?”
– John Green Out of Context
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“WE JUST DID AN AWESOME JOB OF NOT DYING.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“You slobbered on my nose.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I don’t want to screw you. I just love you.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I am not bad at this kissing. Not bad at all.”
– John Green Out of Context
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“IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD’S LARGEST COLLECTION OF...”
– John Green Out of Context
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“I have this amazing body!”
– John Green Out of Context